Yesterday, while putting Ally in the car to go to church:

"What coat is this, Mommy? *sniffs my coat* Smells like blackberries."

And today I learned two things:
1. PB&J and peanut butter and jelly are two different things
2. putting your hands on your naked butt and saying "But Mommy, I'm covering!" is an acceptable alternative to pants.

Tomorrow morning I am taking Allyson to the doctor for her flu shot. And she cannot wait because "there are toys in the waiting room, Mommy. I am going to play with them." Five minutes later she said: "I have to go to the hospital right now. I'm sick,I need my flu shot."

Some days I wonder where she comes up with this crazy stuff. Then she tells me things like "you're my best mommy," and all of a sudden I don't care anymore.

"I have a joke for you," Allyson said to me this morning.

Allyson knows exactly two jokes:

1. How do you know there's been an elephant in your refrigerator? Footprints in the butter
and
2. A certain knock-knock joke involving bananas and "Orange you glad I didn't say banana?" Only her punchline is "Banana Boots," or "banana Dora," or "banana (insert favorite character du jour here)

So anyway: "I have a joke for you. I call it 'Banana Joke.'"
"Oh yeah? Let me have it."
"Knock, knock."
"Who's there?"
"Banana."
"Banana who?"
"Banana Boots!"

And of course I laughed like it was the funniest thing ever.  I guess it's her catchphrase.

Speaking of: SNL - Kings of Catchphrase Comedy 2. I totally want to get on the radio at work and go "SLAPPY PAPPY WEH-WEH!"

Today, we were on the way to the library for story time. Halfway there we were passed by an ambulance, lights blaring.

Allyson: Mommy! What's that?
Me: Well, that's an ambulance. They take sick people to the hospital.
Allyson: And little kids can play in the waiting room!
Me: .... sure, honey.

Naptime for Dora.

Allyson was playing in her room this morning. She was putting her Dora Ballerina doll down for a nap, and wanted to read her a storybook. But first, of course, was to drag over her little Elmo chair. For some reason, the Elmo chair had her Elmo microwave in it. (You can totally tell what Ally's favorite TV show was last Christmas.)

Ally moved the microwave.  It then talked to her: "What are you making?"

"Oh, nothing. I'm just reading a storybook to Dora."

Then she asked me to please leave, and got mad at me when I did it.

Music and Lyrics

Ben is really involved with music. He plays three instruments (clarinet, trombone and guitar), leads our church's praise band, has led our church's bell choir (but is stepping back because he wants to play again), and arranges stuff on occasion.

Recently our choir director (who is also our new bell director) wanted us to play a hymn. She has old music-writing software; she printed out a copy of what she'd written and gave it to Ben to take home and clean up.

Today, Allyson found a sheet of the old music. 

"Mommy!" she said, running up to me. "I worked very hard. I wrote this song for my daddy."

"Oh, great! Will you sing it for me?"

"Nope. I don't have a microphone."

"Please?"

"No microphone, no song."

And then I died of laughter.

She later scribbled on the music with a crayon, so I guess she KIND OF wrote a song. Ben was just impressed that she knew it was supposed to be music.

Allyson has ANOTHER cold. ANOTHER ONE. Good gravy.  She managed to work this one into her bedtime prayer last night too:

"Dear God, thank you for everything. Help me to feel much better. You love us even when we're not happy because we don't feel very good. We love you too. Jesus' name, Amen."

A trio of stories.

1. Saturday morning we were all hanging around before I had to be at work at noon. All of a sudden Allyson runs up to Ben, pulls down her pants and says: "DADDY! LOOK AT MY BUTT!"

2. This morning I woke up Allyson to tell her our Halloween plans.

"We're going to eat breakfast, and do some laundry at Grandma Sue's house. Then when Daddy gets home from work we'll put your costume on and go down to Grandma Deb and Grandpa Jim's house to go trick or treating. After that Grandpa Jim's going to feed us chili."

"That sounds nice. I will be dressed as a cat. You're just going to be dressed like my mommy."

Fun aside: Ben is going to wear his Albert Pujols t-shirt and carry around a small suitcase. He's going as Free Agent Pujols.

3. Just now, I was folding laundry in my mom's basement. Ally came down to "help" and saw a hole in the wall where a register cover goes (Mom hasn't gotten around to replacing it yet."

Ally: That's a hole. Duh.

Me (cracking up): What was that?

Ally: That was my voice saying duh.

She's so goofy.